


Haiba "Man Stealer" Lev

by nyitia02



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Love Triangles, M/M, kenma is tired, kuroo is a salty meme, lev is a big dummy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-20
Updated: 2016-03-20
Packaged: 2018-05-28 00:54:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6307393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nyitia02/pseuds/nyitia02
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Kenma-san, I think I'm in love!"</p>
<p>In which Lev has a bad habit of developing constant, short lived crushes. However, once Yaku gives him a lecture on love, Lev proves to be quite the problem for Kuroo and Kenma.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Haiba "Man Stealer" Lev

**Author's Note:**

> [7:05:16 PM] nagito: WAIT I STILL NEED A TITLE FOR IT  
> [7:05:18 PM] nagito: FUNK  
> [7:06:04 PM] purplecdino: Call it Kenma's a bitch to Kuroo
> 
> -
> 
> this has been sitting in my finished folder for a looong time now lmao,,, thanks to colette for reading thru it for me eve tho she's never seen haikyuu!!

"Kenma-san, I think I'm in love!"

 

Lev's statement was geared towards Kenma, but the four other people around them still looked up. None of them were surprised in the least. After volleyball practice when they went to grab snacks as a group like this weekly, Lev always brought up the new person he had a crush on. It was fun for everyone to see who he was currently infatuated with, and even funnier when he approached them about it, considering his crushes only lasted about three days on average and he always either got rejected or ignored by the objects of his overwhelming affection.

 

"That's what you said last week, Lev," Kenma muttered as he routinely did, eyes focused on his phone even though he wasn't very invested in what he was doing on it, and he heard Kuroo's quiet snicker beside him.

 

"Speaking of last week," piped up Inuoka. "What happened with that girl you wanted to date then?" Inuoka always asked this question when the group hadn't seen for themselves what had happened. It was almost like everyone worked through the same script every week, but Lev never really noticed.

 

He simply waved a hand, shrugging and wrinkling his nose. "I'm over her! She didn't know I existed, anyways."

 

"I'll bet you anything the person you're in love with now doesn't know you exist, either," Yaku said, nudging Lev in the arm rather hard. "Use your brain."

 

"Who is the new crush?" Taketora asked, eyebrows raised.

 

Lev opened his mouth like he was going to say something, and then closed it. Everyone with the exception of Kenma stared at him, waiting for an answer.  Kenma closed his current app and opened Love Live instead. 

 

"I don't actually know her name-" Lev said with too much confidence, and everyone groaned. Even Kenma rolled his eyes, proving he was at least somewhat listening in on the conversation. "But!" Lev tried to speak over his teammates. "I am one hundred percent sure our love will pull through!"

 

"How are we supposed to believe you if the same thing happens every week?" Inuoka said under his breath, bewildered.

 

It was at that point when Yaku let out a short sigh, successfully grabbing Lev's attention. "Listen, Lev," he started, and everyone knew it was time for one of Yaku's motherly lectures. "You're not actually in love, you know that right?" Lev looked almost offended, and tried to say something back, but Yaku simply talked over him. "Love isn't something that just happens out of the blue like you claim. You have to know the person and understand the person and really have a close bond with them before you can honestly say you love them. How can you say that to so many people if you've never even talked to them before? If you keep up like this, you're only going to end up with a really broken heart."

 

Lev tilted his head to the side, contemplating what Yaku had said.

 

"You obviously don't believe in love at first sight," Kuroo jumped in, and Yaku glared when Lev's eyes lit up.

 

"Don't encourage him!" he scolded, and tried to kick Kuroo from where he was sitting, but couldn't reach.

 

Everyone laughed, but Lev laughed the hardest, and ended up having to dodge a hit from an angry Yaku. He knocked into Kenma's arm, causing his hand to slip as he tapped away at his phone. His full combo in Love Live was abruptly broken.

 

\-----

 

Later that night, Kenma sat at his desk, only half paying attention to his homework. He had his earbuds in, music playing as loud as it could go to give him some kind of background noise. However, he kept forgetting about the numbers in his math textbook, eyes drifting off to the same empty space on his wall and brain getting absorbed in the music. In fact, he was beginning to feel a bit tired; he hadn't been sleeping well lately, and he probably would've fallen asleep right there on his textbook if his phone hadn't suddenly cut off his music to ring.

 

Kenma sat up straight at the loud change of noise, clicking his phone on to see who the hell was calling him.

 

It was Lev.

 

Kenma hated how his phone had the audacity to pause his music for something as stupid as this. He also hated how Lev always called him. He hated talking over the phone, but it wasn't like Kenma had told him explicitly. He wished Lev were more like Kuroo, who always just knew to text instead of call. Everything would be so much easier.

 

He didn't really want to talk, plus Lev was an overall exhausting person to talk to, so he considered just leaving the phone to ring. But knowing Lev, Kenma was almost certain he'd just keep calling until Kenma answered. He didn't think Lev was stupid enough to not realize Kenma always had his phone near him, but he was definitely stupid enough to not realize when someone was ignoring him.

 

So, he picked up the phone, making sure to yawn at the first opportunity possible to hopefully show he was tired.

 

"Kenma-san!" came Lev's voice through the phone, and Kenma flinched, holding the phone a little farther away from his ear.

 

"I'm doing homework, Lev, so make it quick." Kenma grumbled, only half lying about the homework. He could probably just go to bed early tonight and copy off of someone in the morning. Oh, but that would mean he had to track down someone with the same homework as him... Should he just do it? And shit, was Lev talking?

 

"Kenma-san, Keeeeeenma-san, did you hear me?"

 

"Um, I spaced out, I'm tired," Kenma said. "And you can stop with the "Kenma-san". Just Kenma is fine."

 

"Oh! Okay! It was nothing... Kenma, I was just commenting on how it's kinda late, so I was surprised you were still doing homework! Nothing important, although I did  _ call  _ for something important, I hope I'm not bothering you, I'll let you go back to your homework in a second-"

 

Kenma wondered how Lev had enough energy to talk like this all the time. Lev's voice started to blend into his brain and he didn't hear it as much. His eyes found themselves back at the same spot on his wall.

 

"Mm," he said, only to keep Lev from screaming his name into the phone again.

 

"Okay, I'll get to the point," He hadn't already? "Remember what Yaku-san was talking about earlier? About love and how I'm taking the idea of it all wrong?"

 

"Yeah," Kenma said, although he wasn't really listening. All he heard was "remember" and "Yaku-san".

 

"I really took his words to heart, Kenma, they were very inspiring, and I don't know how I didn't realize this until now! So I've decided I'm going to stop falling in love with random people, and start falling in love with people I actually know! It'll be more worth my time, right?"

 

"Mmmmhm," Kenma said again, tapping his pencil lightly against his desk to keep himself from falling asleep.

 

"So I thought to myself, who do I have a close bond with and know very well? And then I thought of you, Kenma! We have a bond like that! You being my setter and all, I mean. If you can read my movements enough to toss to me like you do, we must have some sort of connection! Plus, you're very nice and I know you'll never break my heart! I think it's meant to be, if you ask me."

 

"Totally," Kenma went on with half ignoring Lev. Why was he calling, again?

 

"I'm officially in love with you now, Kenma, if that's okay with you! And if we're lucky, maybe we can get married and everything! Does that sound good?"

 

Kenma hadn't realized Lev had stopped talking so soon until Lev went back to loudly saying his name.

 

"Kenmaaaa? Kenma, are you still there? Does that sound good, Kenmaaa?"

 

"Oh, yeah, sounds great, Lev," Kenma snapped out of his tired haze, smacking himself to keep his eyes open. He heard what sounded like an excited squeak come from the other end of the phone, and Kenma could've sworn his ears bled a little.

 

"Okay, thanks Kenma! I gotta go now, make sure you finish your homework!"

 

"Wait, Lev," Kenma remembered at the last second.

 

"Yes?"

 

"Next time... could you text me instead of calling? I don't really like talking on the phone."

 

"Oh, no problem, Kenma! But I really gotta go, so bye! See you tomorrow!"

 

Kenma pushed out a half-hearted goodbye, then hung up his phone, sighing and leaning his head on his math textbook. He couldn't help but wonder just what the hell he could've agreed to that made Lev so excited. He really hoped it wasn't extra time alone with him practicing volleyball, Kenma wasn't sure he'd be able to stand that.

 

Whatever. It probably wasn't anything he couldn't just back out on at the last second. He wasn't sure Lev was capable of taking offense to any rude thing Kenma did.

 

Now then, back to homework. Or... not, Kenma's head felt heavy and comfortable just lying on the book, so his body didn't move when his brain told it to. Forgetting about the homework and knowing he was going to have regrets in the morning, Kenma drifted off to sleep. He hoped Kuroo was at least happy he was getting some rest.

 

\-----

 

The next morning, as Kenma and Kuroo walked to school together as they always did, Kenma noticed Kuroo was staring an awful lot at his face. What was wrong? Did he have something on his face? Did the weird position he fell asleep in last night leave marks?

 

"What are you staring at for?" he asked.

 

"You look a lot more awake than usual, that's all," Kuroo hummed, looking away. "How much sleep did you get last night, and what did you sacrifice to get that much sleep?"

 

Kenma scowled at the last question. "At least a couple hours of level grinding in Pokemon. And some homework," he answered, saying the homework part quietly on purpose.

 

Kuroo still heard him. " _ Kenmaaaa _ ," he started, but Kenma thought a subject change was in order so he could avoid Kuroo's lecture.

 

"Oh, Lev called me last night," he said, a little louder than he usually talked.

 

"Huh?"

 

"I don't remember what it was for though. He said it was important, but I wasn't really listening."

 

"Yikes."

 

"He got me to agree to something, but I don't know what he asked."

 

Kenma felt Kuroo flick the side of his head. "Did you tell him to text you next time?"

 

Kenma nodded, and Kuroo opened his mouth to talk again, but he was interrupted by a rather loud voice.

 

"Keeeeeeeeenmaaaaaaaa-!!"

 

Both Kenma and Kuroo turned around with a start at the yell. Kuroo, realizing who it was, grinned slyly. "Speak of the devil," he muttered, clapping Kenma on the back.

 

None other than Lev Haiba was running towards the two, long arms waving around to catch their attention. When he caught up to them, he smiled wide. "Kenma! I'm so happy to see you!"

 

"Hey Lev," Kuroo said, as if reminding Lev he was there too.

 

"Hello Kuroo-san!" Lev turned to greet Kuroo, although his voice lacked the same amount of excitement it held when he said Kenma's name. As he turned back to look down at Kenma, he somehow sidled in between him and Kuroo, spring in his step as he reached down and grabbed Kenma's hand.

 

"Did you finish your homework last night?" Lev asked, and Kenma stared at Lev's hand, then up at Lev's face. He saw Kuroo right behind him, looking mildly confused and almost personally offended. He gestured to Kenma and Lev's hands, shooting Kenma a look that clearly said "what the hell is this". To be honest, Kenma was wondering the same thing.

 

"Um, not really," Kenma said in reply to Lev. "I got tired."

 

Lev clicked his tongue, and Kenma noticed how he gave his hand a little squeeze. "If you need help finishing it, just give it to me!" He smiled.

 

"I'm a year older than you, Lev..." Kenma said, and Kuroo shot him another look, a little more desperate this time. Kenma tried to shrug as indistinctly as possible, and Kuroo got the message. It wasn't really like Lev would notice no matter how open Kenma was about his shrugging.

 

"Ahh- hey, Lev," Kuroo started, tapping him on the shoulder.

 

Lev turned to Kuroo, stupid grin still on his face. "Yes, Kuroo-san?"

 

"What's..." He motioned to Lev and Kenma's hands. Lev still had an iron grip on Kenma. "What's that all about?"

 

If possible, Lev's smile grew even wider. "Remember how Yaku-san told me to stop falling in love with strangers the other day?" Kuroo nodded. "I decided to fall in love with Kenma instead! Since we're so close and all, I mean. I'm pretty sure we were meant to be! Remind me to thank Yaku-san later!"

 

Kuroo blinked. He looked back at Kenma, who was just now realizing the gravity of this situation. Was this what Lev was calling about last night? Had he really agreed to a relationship with Lev?

 

_ "Does he know we're...?" _ Kuroo mouthed while Lev was looking away, and Kenma knew exactly what he was talking about. Lev didn't know he and Kuroo were already dating, nobody did. This could prove to be a real problem. It wasn't like they could tell Lev that and pass off last night's phone call as Kenma being sleepy. Lev didn't seem like the type of guy who was capable of keeping secrets either, so there was no way they could break the news to him.

 

Lev suddenly leaned down a bit to Kuroo's height. "We might even get married," he whispered loudly, shaking Kenma's hand around. Kuroo laughed a bit to humor Lev, but once he looked away, he shot Kenma another look.

 

_ "He'll get over it," _ Kenma mouthed. Lev was Lev, after all. This would most likely all blow over in a day or two. He'd find someone else to fall in love with, and everything would go back to normal. Kuroo sagged like he was sighing, but he figured Kenma was right, so he let Lev stand in the middle of them and talk loudly about his plans for he and Kenma's wedding. It wasn't like Lev would be all over Kenma all the time, right? They'd get  _ some  _ alone time, wouldn't they?

 

\-----

 

Kuroo was beginning to think that the answer to his question earlier was no, he would not get any alone time with Kenma. Maybe be was just being paranoid, it  _ was  _ only the first day since Lev had announced his love for Kenma, but Kuroo was almost 90% sure Lev had some sort of Kenma tracker on him. Whenever he and Kenma ran into each other during the school day, Lev had almost always showed up completely out of the blue. Kuroo had no idea how he was managing to pull it off, but it was honestly very annoying to be interrupted while he was trying to sneakily flirt with Kenma.

 

At one point, when Lev grabbed Kenma by the arm and lead him off down the hallway right in the middle of his sentence, Kuroo stopped and watched after them to listen in on their "conversation". It wasn't hard, considering how loud Lev was.

 

"Kenma, after we get married and move in together, can we get cats? Like, a ton of them, I'll even name one after you!"

 

Kuroo didn't hear what Kenma said in response, but he was pretty sure it was a no, with the way Lev cried out in disappointment. As dejected as he felt, Kuroo thought to himself about what it would be like to live with Kenma and a lot of cats, and his heart flipped in excitement. However, the goofy smile that had made its way onto his face dropped once Lev broke through the window in his daydream.

 

Trying to take his mind off Haiba "Man-Stealer" Lev, Kuroo spent the rest of his school day thinking up a cat pun on Kenma's name to tell him during volleyball practice that afternoon.

 

\-----

 

Later, in the locker room, when Kenma burst through the door looking awfully violated, Kuroo decided asking what happened was less important than his  _ paw _ sitively groundbreaking cat pun. He sidled up next to Kenma as the smaller boy threw his school bag on the floor in apparent frustration, not even giving the poor thing a chance to look at him before Kuroo totally destroyed him with his play on words.

 

"Hey, Kenma," he started, nudging his shoulder. "Remember earlier, when Lev said he wanted to get a bunch of cats and name one after you? Well, if I was gonna name it, I would totally name it K--"

 

He was brutally cut off by the sound of the locker room door opening with the force of what could only be a desperate Lev-asauras Rex. Kuroo cursed Lev into the next dimension for interrupting his pun, of all things. He also noticed how fast Kenma's head whipped up to look at the six foot four monster, and the look of absolute despair that washed over his entire face.

 

"Kenma!" he exclaimed, as if he was out of breath. "I saw you as you were walking out and I called to you, but I guess you didn't hear me, so I ran after you! But you were so quick and small, I lost you so fast!"

 

"I had my earbuds in," Kenma dealt the excuse so smoothly that Kuroo would've believed it himself if not for the obvious hopelessness burning in his eyes.

 

"You did?" Lev asked, and tipped his head to the side as if trying to remember. "Oh well, that's alright. Tomorrow, though, wait for me!"

 

Kenma made a half hearted noise of what Lev took as agreement, and even though he or Kenma hadn't gotten changed yet, he leapt over to Kenma in what looked like one step, took hold of his arm, and pulled him over to the other side of the locker room to change with him there.

 

Kuroo was left alone. His pun had gone unsaid and Kenma hadn't so much as looked in his direction.

 

"Kenmeow," he muttered under his breath, forgetting Yaku was standing pretty close to him. "I would've named the cat Kenmeow."

 

Scratch that, his pun was shit.

 

Sulking his way out of the locker room and into the court, Kuroo didn't hear Yaku snickering to himself about the whole ordeal.

 

Once the team was all out of the locker room, Kuroo rejoiced when Yaku called Lev over to where he was standing for... something, he wasn't listening, he was just glad he would finally have a chance to talk to Kenma.

 

Turning to the other boy, Kuroo let out a long sigh/groan, and Kenma shuffled closer, shoving his face into Kuroo's arm and screaming as quietly as he could. It had been a while since something had bugged Kenma so much that it pushed him to the silent screaming point, Kuroo noted. Before he could say anything, Kenma lifted his head, tucking his hair behind his ear and giving Kuroo a look that reminded him of a very agitated kitten.

 

"He. Has. Been. Driving. Me.  _ Insane _ ." was all he said, and Kuroo didn't even have to ask who "he" was.

 

"I don't even know where he keeps coming from! He just shows up out of nowhere and latches onto me and he has been sucking the life out of me I don't wanna hear anyone yell my name like that ever again I will-"

 

"It hasn't even been a full day yet," Kuroo interrupted, marveling at how much Kenma had been complaining. "How can you stand being around that kid from Karasuno, then? Aren't they the same?"

 

Kenma stopped mid-muttering. "Shouyou? No, he and Lev are completely different. Being around Shouyou feels like sitting under the sun and getting all warm and happy. Being around Lev like this feels like being put in a washing machine except the washing machine has an oven instead of water."

 

"Poetic," Kuroo commented, cringing at imagining the feeling of being thrown around wildly in an oven.

 

"He's just too overbearing, not my type at all. I can't believe I messed up this badly, I don't know how much more arm shaking and wedding planning I can take." Kenma then promptly shoved his head back into Kuroo's arm, and Kuroo patted his head comfortingly with his free hand.

 

"Hate to tell you this, but I'm not free to hang out until Friday," he winced. It was Tuesday.

 

Sighing, Kenma removed himself and rubbed his eyes. "It's fine," he said, and Kuroo knew he'd calmed down. "It'll be over by then. He'll find someone else, I know it."

 

"I sure hope so."

 

\-----

 

By Thursday night, Kenma was nearly at his wit's end. It had been three days since he'd mistakenly agreed to a relationship with Lev, and it didn't look at all like he was going to be done with Kenma any time soon. 

 

The two of them had already gone on a "date", which consisted of Lev dragging Kenma around town and pointing out things that looked fun to do, none of which Kenma rejected doing. Kenma wasn't sure if it was because he just didn't have the energy to or if it was because he was afraid of disappointing the big baby. He didn't know why, but there was just something about the idea of seeing Lev sad that didn't sit well with Kenma. 

 

From the texts he'd been getting from Kuroo, it was obvious Kenma wasn't the only one bothered by this whole fiasco. After two days had passed and Kuroo barely got any time with Kenma, paired with the fact that he was going to be busy pretty much all week, his messages became less of "let's just wait for him" and more "how can we speed up this breakup".

 

Their week had been spent mainly with Lev showing up at the worst possible times, aka right before Kuroo was about to do something smooth and flirty. Kuroo was beginning to irrationally worry that Kenma didn't have any privacy in his own home, and that if he tried texting Kenma about how much he wanted to kiss him, Lev would  _ somehow  _ interfere.

 

All in all, Lev's affection was exhausting, and Kenma was finally realizing how much he actually appreciated Kuroo. Why not make it into a lesson learning experience, he'd thought. Lesson number one: don't agree to things when you're tired and not listening, especially if it's Lev. Lesson number two: if your boyfriend treats you well, regardless of his bad jokes, appreciate every moment he's with you, because you never know when a lovey dovey, volleyball for brains, half Russian giant is going to take a direct nosedive into your relationship.

 

Thankfully, it was Thursday night, which meant the next day after school Kenma was finally free to hang out with Kuroo. They'd been texting each other about it all night, along with betting on how much longer they thought this thing with Lev was going to last. They were almost at four days, and usually Lev would get disinterested after maybe three, but the longest any of his crushes had lasted was six days. Kuroo thought that maybe because Kenma was a teammate that he knew better, his infatuation would last a little more on the longer side. Kenma hoped to god Kuroo was wrong and that it ended very soon. Lev was a good guy in small doses, but for someone like Kenma, being around him all the time was just plain old tiring.

 

The next morning, as Kenma met up with Kuroo on the way to school, they spent the few minutes they had alone before Lev usually showed up planning out what time they were going to finally hang out. The two decided that right after school was the best time, since they didn't have practice, Kenma's parents weren't going to be home, and because Kuroo just couldn't wait any longer.

 

"You just wait," Kuroo had said with a smirk, quietly though, because neither of them knew when Lev was going to strike. "Once we're alone, I'm gonna--"

 

Loud footsteps interrupted Kuroo for what must've been the fiftieth time that week. Kuroo wanted to scream for an hour straight. Of course...  _ of course _ Lev would magically appear right as Kuroo was in the middle of hardcore flirting-- It was okay, though, the reminder that he'd be alone with Kenma later that day was enough to help him keep his cool.

 

"Hiya, Kenma! And Kuroo-san, too!" Lev called, joyful as ever, and both Kenma and Kuroo wondered if he would still be happy if he knew the suffering he was causing.

 

As usual, he nudged Kuroo over and slid up to Kenma, throwing an arm around his shoulders. It was so routine now that Kuroo didn't even put up a fight anymore, he simply stepped aside to give Lev all the room he needed.

 

Kenma noted that today, the usual sparkle in Lev's eyes was missing. Not that he looked unhappy, it was just different than what Kenma had gotten (too) used to. Even though Lev was an annoying little shit sometimes, Kenma couldn't help but worry just a little bit. He guessed that there was just something on his mind, although he couldn't guess what it could possibly be.

 

"What's up, Lev?" he asked, just to make sure it was nothing bad. Lev's dazed expression vanished in an instant, and he looked down at Kenma with a grin.

 

"Ah, I'm just thinking about something, that's all! Nothing's wrong, but thank you for your concern!" He legitimately looked fine, so Kenma's worries disappeared. He had been right. Lev was just thinking for once, and it looked so odd and out of place that he'd mistaken it for something bad.

 

"Don't you have a test today, Kenma?" Lev asked, to fill in the silence. 

 

"Oh-- yeah, I do," Kenma had genuinely forgotten he had a test that morning, and he wasn't sure if he studied for it or not. He remembered telling Lev about it over text the other night, though. 

 

Lev must've been thinking pretty hard about whatever it was on his mind, because his "good luck" in reply took a lot longer to come out of him than usual. The walk to school was quieter and more awkward than any day had been all week, and part of Kenma was grateful for that, because that meant Kuroo actually got to talk instead of both of them having to listen to just Lev's voice the whole time.

 

Before they had to part ways at school, however, Lev did something he hadn't done at all over the course of he and Kenma's little "relationship". Lev leaned down and hooked his arms under Kenma's, lifting him up off the ground and hugging him. Feet dangling, Kenma could do nothing but hold onto Lev, afraid he was going to slip out of his grip and fall. After a couple of seconds, Lev carefully placed him back down on the ground and smiled.

 

"See you later, Kenma!" he said, and with that, he waved and skipped away.

 

"Aww," Kuroo cooed. "That was cute."

 

"Even you don't do that to me," Kenma commented, straightening his shirt.

 

"Maybe I should," Kuroo said to himself. It didn't look too hard to pick Kenma up, and seeing him with his tiny little feet hanging above the ground was simply too adorable to pass up. "Say, though--" Kuroo changed the subject. "Didn't Lev look a little weird today? I know you asked him what was up, but I don't know if he was telling the truth."

 

"I think it's fine," Kenma replied. "Who knows, maybe he was thinking about how he's gonna break up with me later?"

 

Kuroo laughed a bit, reaching out to ruffle Kenma's hair. Kenma scowled, pushing the hair that had fallen in his face out of the way.  "Hey, just one more walk with Lev and then we'll be one hundred percent alone..." Kuroo sang, wiggling his eyebrows.

 

Kenma rolled his eyes. "I gotta get going, Kuroo," he said dismissively, turning, waving and walking in the other direction, ignoring Kuroo's disappointed squawk.

 

\-----

 

As Kenma left school that day, he was expecting Lev to be waiting right outside, jumping on him the second he exited the building. However, his slight stall in the doorway to combat the force of Lev was all for nothing, because no Lev was there to launch at him. Confused, Kenma peeked out the door; maybe he was going for a surprise attack today?

 

To Kenma's surprise, Lev was nowhere near the door. He was outside, but a little ways down the sidewalk already. He was busy talking to someone, it seemed. That someone was small, smaller than Kenma, and Lev seemed to be listening to him with all his attention. When the tiny person turned a bit to the side, Kenma recognized him immediately.

 

It was Yaku. Lev was talking with Yaku? And Yaku wasn't coming at him with intentions to fight? They didn't seem to be talking about volleyball because Lev didn't look horribly confused, in fact, both of them were laughing. Were they just having a friendly conversation?

 

This was odd.

 

Kenma had accidentally stared for too long, he guessed, because Lev looked up and caught sight of him. "Oh, Kenma!" he yelled, waving his pool noodle of an arm around wildly. Once Kenma had reluctantly shuffled over, Lev continued. "I was waiting for you out here and then I saw Yaku-san!" he explained. "I mean, I almost didn't, with how tiny you are and all--" Lev barely got to shoot a sly grin at Yaku before the smaller boy's foot made contact with his shin. Kenma heard Yaku mutter a "shut up", but there was still a trace of a smile on his face.

 

_ This was definitely odd. _

 

"So..." Kenma interrupted. "did either of you see Kuroo come out here?"

 

"No," Yaku and Lev said in unison. 

 

"Maybe he's just running a little late today," Yaku went on. "You two have plans?"

 

"I guess," Kenma replied, realizing this was a perfect way to get Lev out of the picture for the walk home. "Why don't you guys just walk home together?" he suggested. "I'll wait for Kuroo."

 

"No, no! We'll all wait for Kuroo and go in a big group!" Lev said, shutting down Kenma's idea in an instant. "It's a Friday and we don't have practice today, it'll be fun!"

 

Yaku shrugged, and Kenma sighed. At least they'd have Yaku there to keep Lev in line.

 

The three of them waited for Kuroo for a couple more minutes, Kenma watching how Lev kept side-eyeing Yaku and fidgeting. Something was definitely up, there was no doubt about it.

 

Once Kuroo finally came outside and apologized for being so late, the four of them started off for home. All throughout the walk, Lev walked next to Yaku, leaving Kenma on the end next to Kuroo. After a bit, Kuroo noticed, and he reached down to tug on Kenma's sleeve.

 

_ "You see that? He's ignoring you!" _ Kuroo whispered, and Kenma shrugged in reply. He had a vague idea of where this was going, and for the first time while in Lev's presence, Kenma grabbed hold of Kuroo's hand and the two walked like that the rest of the way. Lev didn't notice in the slightest.

 

The second Kenma and Kuroo arrived at Kenma's house, it was like a huge weight had been lifted from their shoulders. The two of them went inside and made their way up to Kenma's room, and halfway up the stairs Kuroo poked Kenma in the back.

 

"What was all that with Lev just now?" he asked while Kenma opened his door.

 

"No idea," Kenma replied, throwing his bag on the floor and flopping on his back onto his bed.

 

Kuroo shut the door behind him, locking it for emphasis, then frowned when he realized Kenma hadn't even been watching. "Hey," he tried, finally catching Kenma's attention. "You ready for some fun?"

 

Kenma stared at him for a second. "Jesus, Kuroo," Kenma finally said, shifting his hips to take his phone out of his pocket.

 

Noticing he was about to be ignored for a phone, Kuroo figured he had to step up his game. "Say, Kenma," he said, waiting until Kenma's eyes shifted from the phone screen to him. "Don't you kinda feel like you're cheating on Lev?"

 

"No," came the curt response, and Kuroo gasped in mock surprise.

 

"Yeesh, you sure are one naughty kitten..." That comment definitely got Kenma's attention, and he even lowered his phone a little. Kuroo made his way over to the bed, trying his very hardest to look somewhat sexy.

 

"You're a loser," Kenma said, looking amused instead of turned on like Kuroo was hoping for.

 

"Oh come on," Kuroo pouted. "I'm doing my best!" 

 

"Six out of ten," Kenma replied, "I would've only given that a one, but you get an extra five points because you're cute." His eyes shot right back to his phone, and Kuroo wasn't sure if that comment was supposed to be a compliment or an insult or both.

 

"How do I get a ten?" he asked, shifting closer to Kenma. Kenma made a short humming noise in reply, Kuroo still moving closer. Eventually he got close enough to the point where Kenma's grip on his phone let up a bit, and soon enough it had fallen on the bed sheets with a dull thump.

 

It was finally time, Kuroo rejoiced in his head and braced himself for the soft feeling of Kenma's lips. He was ready, he had been waiting patiently, and best of all, there was no Lev at all to interrupt them--

 

Until Kenma's phone buzzed rather loudly and both of them jumped.

 

Kuroo swore under his breath as Kenma perked up at the sound. He took one glance at the screen, then looked back at Kuroo, who was dreading the worst.

 

"It's Lev," Kenma said, voice taking the most tired sounding monotone Kuroo had ever heard come out of him.

 

_ "Oh my  _ **_god_ ** _ ," _ Kuroo groaned, and considered giving up on life completely. "Didn't he know we had plans?"

 

"I thought I told him!" Kenma huffed, expression resembling a small angry cat again. He turned and reached down for his phone, opening the text he'd gotten from Lev.

 

**To: You**

**From: Lev**

hi kenma! i'm really really sorry about this and i hope you will have it in you to forgive me!! you see, the other day i stayed after practice with yaku-san, and one thing lead to another, and i think he really likes me!! i never thought that when yaku-san gave me that speech about love, he was hinting that i should date him!! and the worst part is, i think i like him a lot too....

 

Kenma stopped reading there for a moment, looking up at Kuroo. "He's been cheating on me with Yaku!" he exclaimed. 

 

"Shit, really?" Kuroo asked, sort of in a state of disbelief. Kenma didn't answer, and kept reading instead.

 

that's why i was thinking so hard today, kenma! i was very very confused about whether i liked you or yaku-san, and that's why i hugged you as well! it was kind of a test, i think! but i'm sorry to say that i think i like yaku-san in that way a little more, and i am oh so very very very sorry about not telling you the day it happened!!!!!! please forgive me!!!!! i hope we can still be very good friends and you will still toss to me!!!!! when i get married to yaku-san i will still name a cat after you if it makes you happy!!!!

 

"I think it's over," Kenma said, relieved. Kuroo peeked over his shoulder, reading what Lev had sent.

 

"Wow," was all he had to say, sitting back and whistling. He had never thought it was possible for someone to cheat on their significant other in such a pure and non malicious way. He brushed the thoughts of Lev aside, though, he had more important things to think about. "Now that this is over and done with, do you think we can get back to... you know..."

 

"Wait, hold on," Kenma said, fingers ready over the phone's keyboard. "I need to reply to him or he'll think I hate him." He ignored Kuroo's disgruntled huff.

 

**To: Lev**

**From: You**

It's okay, Lev. I forgive you. You were just confused about love, and me being your setter and all, I was the first one you looked to. I don't feel used at all, so don't worry, and I hope you and Yaku are happy together.

 

"Too cheesy?" he asked, tilting the screen so Kuroo could see.

 

Kuroo scoffed. "It's really cheesy, but gee, Kenma, he won't care."

 

Sending the text with a shrug, Kenma dropped the phone back on the bed and Kuroo took that as his cue. He took Kenma by the shoulders and pushed him down onto the bed, leaning in and beginning to feel a lot more satisfied than he had all week. 

 

The both of them ignored when Kenma's phone buzzed again about a minute later.

 

**To: You**

**From: Lev**

oh thank you so much kenma!!!! i feel so relieved now, i am so lucky to have such a nice guy like you as my friend and my setter!!

 

**To: You**

**From: Lev**

oh, and also, i remembered you said you and kuroo-san had plans together today, so have lots of fun with him!!!! :)))


End file.
